A Couple of Small Things = A Big Step Forward

I haven't really written about the divorce in awhile.  I haven't really needed or wanted to... but here's a small update in case you are interested.

There were some things that I wasn't sure how I was going to handle... actually there are still some things I don't know what I'm going to do - like my wedding ring or wedding photos and stuff... but that's not what this post is about.

Over the course of a few weeks I've taken three steps in what I feel like is the healing process.  Once I completed the last of these three it just dawned on me that I felt like I took a pretty big step forward.

1. I can't remember if I did this first or the next thing first, but honestly it doesn't matter much.  I went through my phone and deleted all of the pictures of him.  I was just sick of them getting in the way of other pictures I wanted to view.  I did keep the pictures of the dogs for the time being as it's something I'm not sure how I want to handle (add it to the list!)
2. I went through my Facebook page and removed all of those pictures too.  I also untagged myself or removed from page any pictures of us together.  This was a pretty time consuming feat... but it felt surprisingly refreshing to have that done. (another thing on this list - how to handle past blog posts
3. Finally, I changed the background picture on my phone.  Ever since I got this phone (August 2009) I have had the same background picture of a Imos heart shaped pizza.  This really didn't sadden me when I looked at the phone - b/c I heart shaped pizza is a happy thing - plus I would get comments on it and I thought it was cool.  But it's time to get rid of that too.  So now it is a picture of the World Series Game I attended with my sister.

These probably sound silly... and might sound like I'm trying to delete him from my life... and I guess in a way that's exactly what I'm doing... but it's more than that.  He was a big, important part of my life... a big part... and I don't know how you handle something like this which is why I've waited 5 months to make these changes... the truth is it's just a step in the moving on process.  Just because I deleted pictures doesn't mean I'm deleting my memory... but it's nice to not have to see that stuff all the time.  Like have things that will sting when I see them.  I did this with a level head and not out of spite or anger... and I'm happy about that.

In the end I feel like I'm a big step forward and that truly, honestly feels wonderful!